34 amazing first lines of famous books.

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ever wonder how to get your book reviewed?

Ever wonder “How to get my book reviewed”?

So you’ve published your book. Its been edited and published, and now you’re trying to figure out how to get to your potential readers. While starting your marketing campaign usually happens well More »

‘People are hungry for real bookstores’: Judy Blume on why US indie booksellers are growing

At 78, the multimillion-selling author has begun a new career, opening her own bookshop and joining a business sector thats flourishing again in the US   She might be a beloved and More »

How the GOP Screwed Obama on Immigration Reform

TYLER MORAN

Policy Director, National Immigration Law Center (20012012)

Deputy Policy Director, Domestic Policy Council, White House (20122014)

Senior Policy Advisor, U.S. Senate Democratic Leader Harry Reid (20142017)

There had been a real pivot to the White House from the advocacy community to pressure the administration to grant legal status to Dreamerswhich, at that time, [the White House] was really pushing back and saying the presidents office didnt have the authority to do it, [that] it was Congresss deal. There was a really ramped-up, intense pressure leading through 11 and then finally in 12.

LUIS GUTIRREZ

D-Illinois, Fourth District, US House of Representatives (1993 )

By this point, theres a broad movement. Its April of 2012, and he sent Cecilia Muoz to speak to the Congressional Hispanic Caucus, because I had already met with Senator Rubio on a DREAM Act bill, which would give them status but wouldnt give them citizenship. And I had gone around telling everybody, If Obama wont stop the deportationsbecause his deportation numbers were going upwe should all work with Rubio and get a bipartisan bill and at least set aside the Dreamers.

CECILIA MUOZ

Director of Intergovernmental Affairs, White House (20092012)

Director, Domestic Policy Council, White House (20122017)

I remember the meeting. While the press got really excited about a Rubio puts Obama in a tough spot narrative, the impetus for DACA evolved from a bunch of policy shifts… Essentially, therere eleven million people who are deportable, and before the Obama administration, the [Homeland Security] strategy was to find as many of them as possible. So [DHS] Secretary Napolitano [began] modest steps toward establishing a system of priorities so that they went from, Lets find as many people as we can to, Lets be strategic and go after people who are priorities because they pose some kind of harm or threat. Everybody agreed the Dreamers should be low priority for enforcement, and lo and behold, Dreamers kept ending up in the deportation pipeline because the policy was not airtight enough and the behavior at the agency was not changing enough. And Secretary Napolitanos barometer was, Are we still picking up Dreamers? Are we wasting enforcement resources on these folks? Because that kept happening, she brought DACA to us.[2]

TYLER MORAN

On my first day at the White House I was told we were going to move on what became DACA and was in the Rose Garden on Friday for the announcement… The president had basically approved giving deferred action to Dreamers. Then we had sixty days to stand up the program. So it was a pretty crazy summer, because on August 15, the first applications could be accepted… Post-election, obviously the presidents numbers with Latinos were, like, huge. Percentages in some of the states were impressive enough that people felt really confident about immigration. Thats when the senior advisors decided that the White House would make a push on some kind of immigration reform, and it was in November that the president instructed us to have a bill ready for him, I think by the end of Christmas break.

LUIS GUTIRREZ

After the election, they moved in the Senate, and in the House, we were working with the Republicans.

TYLER MORAN

We saw a bipartisan effort there in the House, and we provided support to them, not as intensely as the Senate, because it was in the drafting stages. And the president did tons behind the scenesphone calls that were not public, asking, What can we do? Boehner would say, Well, back off. Give us some space. Okay, we can do that…. Some Republicans sort of looked at the partys position on immigration and felt like, We cant be the party thats going to stick with the old white men. Like, Were going to become dinosaurs, and if we dont start talking to people outside of ourselves, were not gonna survive as a party. That was kind of the postmortem that Priebus took the lead on after the election.[4]

TYLER MORAN

The White House effort [for immigration reform in 2013] was definitely a stealth operation . . . Behind the scenes, we gave a ton of bipartisan briefings. In the Senate, you had this Gang of Eight with Republicans who really believed they needed to reach out to Latinos and that they really had to push for [legislation].

CECILIA MUOZ

In the administration, we had long since drafted a bill. We had a bill drafted in 2010. So we took that bill back out, revised it, [and] essentially fed pieces of that bill to the Gang of Eight in order to speed up the process. The 2013 bill was big and complex, obviously, and it was important to the president that we contribute in whatever way that was most useful… The Gang of Eight dynamic was such that it was important to be behind the scenes, so thats what we did.

TYLER MORAN

Lots of other Republicans were supportive, but they just felt nervous about any type of backlashparticularly if you looked at the composition of Republicans that ultimately came forward and voted for the bill, they didnt until there was this Corker-Hoeven Amendment, which basically put a shitload of resources on the southern border. So much so that Border Patrol could hold hands or something.[6] It was this unnecessary amount of resources, but it brought on a ton more votes, and, if you think about the Senate, the fact that there were sixty-eight votes was insane. That doesnt happen on a huge, huge, huge piece of legislation . . . but there was also some navet about momentum that would be created for the House to then move.

BARBARA BOXER

D-California, U.S. Senate (19932017)

We had a great bill, and that bill got so many votes. The comprehensive immigration reform was so good for the economy. It was fair to everybody, and it died because John Boehner would not bring it up.

TYLER MORAN

Boehners a true believer on immigration, but, you know, it went from the Republican Study Committee to the Freedom Caucus, and… I cant speak for him, but I think he just had to make strategic decisions about rocking the boat. Hed already rolled them on the debt limit. I guess you had to pick and choose when to do that.

LUIS GUTIRREZ

We passed it in the Senate. We never got it done in the House. Then I went back to Obama because Janet Murgua, president of the National Council of La Raza, called him deporter in chief, and that really stung Obama.

TYLER MORAN

The advocates started getting really restless. Instead of turning on the House as their focus for accountability, they turned on the White House . . . You know, trying to push for immigration reform, there was a feeling that [the White House] needed to show the American public that you believed in enforcement, and [that we werent pushing for] open borders. But in hindsight, I was like, What did we get for that? We deported more people than ever before. All these families separated, and Republicans didnt give him one ounce of credit. There may as well have been open borders for five years.

Excerpted from OBAMA: An Oral History, 2009-2017 by Brian Abrams, copyright 2018 by Brian Abrams and reprinted with permission of Little A Books.

Read more: https://www.thedailybeast.com/how-the-gop-screwed-obama-on-immigration-reform

The Species That Inspired Dr Seuss “The Lorax” Change The Story’s Meaning

The Lorax by Dr Seuss has been millions of children’s first introduction to environmentalism, its ominous warning incorporated into countless activist campaigns. Most adults probably assume the species the book describes meeting its doom came entirely from Seuss’ imagination. Almost 50 years after the book was written, however, clues to its origins have been found, leading to an interpretation even more ahead of its time than the one imputed by critics

The story recounts the felling of forests of Truffula trees, to be turned into “thneeds”, because “business is business! And business must grow”. The titular character repeatedly pops up claiming to “speak for the trees” and demand the destruction cease, but is ignored, until the last tree is felled, leaving behind a blasted, barren landscape.

Seuss (Theodor Geisel) invented species at a great rate, so it wouldn’t be surprising if the book’s Truffula trees and Bar-ba-loots were as imaginary as Star-Belly Sneetches. However, Seuss also built powerful cartoons around reality, such as his warnings about the dangers of fascism at a time when most Americans were heedless.

Dartmouth University Professors Nathaniel Dominy and Donald Pease scoured the book, and Seuss’ life, for clues to its inspiration, and how that might change the meaning.

Most of the much-lauded book was written while Seuss was visiting Kenya in 1970, just as the environmental movement was making its first impact in the United States. The healthy Truffula trees look like giant dandelions. However, the book also portrays spikey remnant trees that resemble the whistling thorn acacias Seuss would have seen on his trip.

An early sketch of the Lorax pre-publication, given by Dr Seuss to President Johnson. LBJ Presidential Library, Austin, Texas/Dr. Seuss Enterprises, L.P. 

Dominy and Pease argue in Nature Ecology & Evolution that this similarity is the key to understanding the book. The acacia thorns have a commensal relationship with patas monkeys, who get most of their diet from the trees, but don’t harm them in the process. The Lorax looks and even sounds like the orange monkeys, something Dominy confirmed by having image recognition software compare Seuss’ drawings with a variety of monkey species.

If the Lorax represents the monkeys, the paper claims, he is not an external owner asserting authority, as most discussions of the book have suggested. Instead, the Lorax is; “A part of the ecological system, not apart from it,” Pease said in a statement. The book becomes not just a warning about overharvesting and pollution, but a forerunner of the deep ecology movement.

The paper notes the whistling thorns are today overgrazed and drought-stricken, and the monkeys’ range collapsing. Just as the Lorax ends with a message of hope, however, Dominy and Pease believe both can still be saved. Perhaps the discovery will spark a tourism revival among those who love the book, making acacia thorns more valuable alive than dead.

Read more: http://www.iflscience.com/plants-and-animals/the-species-that-inspired-dr-seuss-lorax-change-the-storys-meaning/

Top Dem candidate gave millions to groups advocating for taxing families ‘to the hilt’ for ‘irresponsible breeding’

Scott Wallace, a liberal millionaire candidate running for Congress in Pennsylvania, has given millions of dollars to so-called population control groups.

Such groups have advocated for taxing parents “to the hilt” for having more than two children, calling it “irresponsible breeding,” and said abortion is “a highly effective weapon” to combat overpopulation.

Wallace, grandson of a former vice president who’s running as a Democrat in Pennsylvania’s 1st Congressional District against Republican incumbent Rep. Brian Fitzpatrick, has used the Wallace Global Fund to give out nearly $7 million to population control groups since 1997.

Zero Population Growth (ZPG) was among the organizations that received the money from the fund. According to public records, it received $420,000 between 1997 and 2003.

“No responsible family should have more than two children.”

– Zero Population Growth, a group that received funding from Scott Wallace.

The group, shortly after being founded in 1968, released a brochure advocating abortion to stabilize population growth and claimed that “no responsible family should have more than two children.” To deal with larger families, it also called for families to be “taxed to the hilt” for “irresponsible breeding.”

Paul Ehrlich, who co-founded the ZPG, once called abortion “a highly effective weapon in the armory of population control.” The goal of the organization, which changed its name to Population Connection in 2002, has remained the same since its inception, arguing that the world needs to contain population growth with particular emphasis on American families.

Wallace’s fund also gave $20,000 in 2010 to the Center for the Advancement of the Steady State Economy (CASSE), a group that sees the economic growth as undesirable and instead supports an economy with “stable or mildly fluctuating levels” and a society where birth rates equal death rates.

The organization openly supports zero population growth and its executive board member, Herman Daly, advocated issuing reproduction licenses, allowing women to have only two children, unless they buy the license for more children from other women. Daly called it the “best plan yet offered” to limit population growth.

Zoe Wilson-Meyer, communications director for Wallace’s campaign, didn’t answer Fox News’ questions on whether Wallace still supports the ideas expressed by the groups.

“The Wallace Global Fund has for decades been a leader in helping women gain access to family planning. Former Co-Chair Scott Wallace is proud of the work of grantees like Planned Parenthood in empowering women and protecting reproductive rights and will stand up for Pennsylvania women,” she said in an email.

“Former Co-Chair Scott Wallace is proud of the work of grantees like Planned Parenthood in empowering women and protecting reproductive rights and will stand up for Pennsylvania women.”

– Scott Wallace’s campaign communications director Zoe Wilson-Meyer

“In Washington, Brian Fitzpatrick voted to defund Planned Parenthood and supports Donald Trump’s effort to take away a woman’s right to choose,” she added.

The revelations of the foundation’s donations come as Wallace faces continuing criticism over past funding activities. The foundation reportedly donated hundreds of thousands of dollars to anti-Israel groups that support a boycott of the Jewish State. Local Democratic groups in the state expressed deep concern about the donations, but have since endorsed Wallace after he renounced the donations made in the name of his family’s fund.

TOP DEM HOUSE HOPEFUL FUNDED GITMO DETAINEES’ LEGAL HELP ‘JUST AFTER 9/11’

Fox News previously reported that Wallace was also a key financier of the Center for Constitutional Rights’ efforts to represent alleged terrorists in the Guantanamo Bay just after the Sept. 11, 2001, terror attacks.

“Just after 9/11 many were afraid of the work the Center was doing,” Vince Warren, executive director of the group, told Wallace’s alma mater’s Haverford Magazine in 2009, adding that funding the center’s work was difficult. “And yet H. Scott Wallace ’73 of the Wallace Global Fund, stepped up and helped.”

The race in Pennsylvania’s 1st Congressional District is among the most high-stakes election in the country in the upcoming midterms. The Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee (DCCC) added Wallace’s candidacy to its “Red to Blue” program aimed at flipping the district.

Lukas Mikelionis is a reporter for FoxNews.com. Follow him on Twitter @LukasMikelionis.

Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2018/07/20/top-dem-candidate-gave-millions-to-groups-advocating-for-taxing-families-to-hilt-for-irresponsible-breeding.html

This men’s talk show got uncomfortably candid about #MeToo. It’s a must-watch.

Warning: The video and article below discusses sexual violence and rape.

There’s a new men’s talk show called “Man Enough” that just devoted an entire gut-wrenching episode to the #MeToo movement and sexual assault.

The guys who participated in the episode’s roundtable — Justin Baldoni, Matt McGorry, Lewis Howes, Jamey Heath, Tony Porter, and Scooter Braun — opened up about their own shortcomings and experiences with sexual abuse and how, exactly, men can be part of the solution.

It’s worth a watch, for men especially. Here’s the full episode (story continues below):

Man Enough Episode 4 – #MeToo

How can we learn from #MeToo to shape the next generation of men?

Join the conversation with Justin Baldoni, Matt McGorry, Jamey Heath, Lewis Howes, Scooter Braun, Tony Porter, Karen Alston, Alma Gonzalez and Yazmin Monet Watkins.

Stay tuned after the episode for a special message from our partner, Child Safety Pledge.

#ManEnough #Harrys #ChildSafetyPledge

Posted by We Are Man Enough on Tuesday, July 24, 2018

McGorry, who stars in ABC’s “How to Get Away With Murder,” chatted with me about the episode, which he helped produce alongside Baldoni. (Baldoni’s company, Wayfarer Entertainment, launched “Man Enough” in 2017.)

(This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.)

“Man Enough” is such an important and terrific show! What was it like personally being a part of the episode on sexual abuse and #MeToo?

Thank you so much. The support means a great deal and I am truly honored to be a part of this show, both on-camera and as a producer. This episode in particular is of great importance. It is one of the pieces of work that I am proudest to have been a part of in my career.

We are at a fork in the road: We can either pat ourselves on the back for clearing the extremely low bar of not being an abuser, or we can take on the challenge of understanding that we have a responsibility to actively be a part of the solution.

Porter and McGorry participate in the roundtable on #MeToo and sexual abuse. Image by “Man Enough”/Wayfarer Entertainment.

In the episode, you mention fame or power can be “intoxicating” because women may approach you differently. What advice would you give to men to keep that intoxicating feeling in check and treat women respectfully?

Positive feelings based on receiving attention are quite natural and are not, in and of themselves, problematic. But what we choose to do based on these feelings really forms who we are and who we become.

“We need to develop the ability to self-reflect and to listen to the voices of women. We need to understand that having good intentions is not enough.”

As men, we rarely have to think about what life is like as a woman. A lifetime of messaging about what constitutes being a “real man” has taught us to distance ourselves from anything that is seen as feminine. Combine this with the constant dehumanization of women that is largely invisible to men, and you have the perfect cocktail of traits that will pull us into treating and thinking about women in problematic ways.

In order to counteract this, we need to develop the ability to self-reflect and to listen to the voices of women. We need to understand that having good intentions is not enough. While good intentions are important, it is the impact of our actions that we really need to work on examining.

You noted that even the language men use when dating or simply talking to women can be harmful — like “getting women,” for instance — by taking their agency out of it. Why do you think shifting the language we use is so crucial?

Language is important because it represents how we think and what we value. I have found, in conversations with men about subtle and not-so-subtle uses of sexist and dehumanizing language, the wording is often indicative of underpinnings of sexist beliefs. And to be clear, I’m not saying this automatically makes someone a bad human being, but I am saying that it’s a part of the larger fabric of a society that dehumanizes, objectifies, and devalues women.

Words like “bossy” exist to shame women into taking up less space. You’ll never hear the word used to describe men because those same behaviors are seen as assertive, bold, and positive in men. You’ll never hear the words “slut” or “whore” used to describe men negatively, because having many sexual partners is seen as a positive attribute in men.

I am not saying that using the “right words” is the #1 solution to getting rid of sexism, but I do believe it’s a great way into the conversation. Our socialization that teaches us to value men above women is never-ending, and thus, our process of questioning and evolving must also be.

McGorry speaks in Washington, D.C., in 2016. Photo by Leigh Vogel/Getty Images.

Did you ever have some kind of aha moment or experience an event that challenged you to think differently on gender and sexism?

There were a few events that made me question what I knew. The first was in reading a book by a woman about her experiences in the workplace and how they were defined by sexism. I was honestly baffled by the fact that I had never known or considered how different my experience was simply because I was a man. The fact that I had such a glaringly large gap in understanding, when I thought of myself as an introspective and perceptive person, really rocked me.

After reading the book, I was in a relationship with a woman who was an entrepreneur looking to start a business. She called me one night, frustrated and beaten down by the bullshit she had to deal with by the men she was hoping would invest in her company. Lunch often was rescheduled into late-night drinks, and she constantly had to walk a line of being friendly enough that she wouldn’t be labeled “cold” or “bitchy” but not so friendly that she was considered “a tease” or “leading them on.”

I was deeply angry but felt frustrated that I didn’t know what to do other than expressing how sorry I was that she had to go through this, knowing that I would never have to.

“There is so much brilliance in marginalized voices that so often gets ignored by those of us with privilege.”

Not long after, I watched Emma Watson’s He for She address to the United Nations. And the often-quoted closing line that was an invitation for men in to the fight for gender equity was to ask ourselves, “If not me, who? If not now, when?” It was at that moment that I felt overwhelmed with a sense that I had to try and be part of the solution.

Being a part of the solution is often a much slower, nonlinear process. And some of the most important parts of this work are less glamorous because they are rooted in self-examination and a willingness to have difficult, uncomfortable conversations with other men who are likely to be defensive.

If I really wanted to be a part of the solution, I had to be willing to listen to what women on the forefront of the movement for equality had been asking us to do. And in the feminist movement, that work ascribed to men was often about re-educating ourselves, examining our own biases, and changing traditional male culture in this same way.

Porter and McGorry participate in the roundtable on #MeToo and sexual abuse on “Man Enough.” Image via Wayfarer Entertainment.

You’re a big reader. Any good books written by women that you would recommend for men to pick up if they’re new to understanding allyship?

Absolutely. Without realizing it, we men watch TV or film, read books, and consume culture that is predominantly created by men. Because of the nature of structural sexism, women — and especially women of color because of the added layer of racism — get less opportunities than male creators do, and so we become used to seeing everything through a male and white lens. And this is an integral part of our socialization as people.

There is so much brilliance in marginalized voices that so often gets ignored by those of us with privilege. A question that I have been asking the other men and white people in my life more and more is, “When was the last time you read a book by a woman? How about a woman of color?”

We are trained to think that books about feminism are for women and that books about race are for people of color. But it is actually men and/or white folks who have the most to learn on these topics, and I truly believe that we cannot reach our fullest potential without consciously and consistently including these perspectives into our lives.

Some of the books by women that have been impactful to me include “The Will To Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love” by bell hooks, “Sex Object: A Memoir” by Jessica Valenti, “Women, Race & Class” by Angela Y. Davis, “The Mother of All Questions” by Rebecca Solnit, and “Bad Feminist” by Roxane Gay.

Understanding the role that men play in ending violence against women and girls is important as well. In addition to the ones listed above, the following are books by men about how we are socialized and our role in ending sexism: “Men’s Work: How to Stop the Violence That Tears Our Lives Apart” by Paul Kivel, “Breaking out of the Man Box: The Next Generation of Manhood” by Tony Porter, and “Angry White Men: American Masculinity at the End of an Era” by Michael Kimmel.

“I wholeheartedly believe in the ability of conversation to shift culture and create change.”

What are your hopes for this episode of “Man Enough,” in regards to what men take away from it?

My hope for men watching this episode is that they feel moved and inspired to become a part of the solution; to see themselves reflected in the guests of the show, as well-intentioned men who want to be better; and to come away with ways of really starting to notice and examine all of the things we don’t even realize are invisible to us, but that form the basis of a society where women and girls are abused at epidemic rates.

I wholeheartedly believe in the ability of conversation to shift culture and create change. And I hope that men will share it with the boys and other men in their lives to create more of those conversations.

When I began this journey four years ago, I thought that it was something I was doing for other people. What I didn’t realize was the transformative power that it would have over my own life. And it is my deepest hope that men realize that our own humanity is on the line here as well.

Read more: http://www.upworthy.com/this-men-s-talk-show-got-uncomfortably-candid-about-me-too-it-s-a-must-watch

World Cup final: France crowned world champion after 4-2 win over Croatia

(CNN)There was to be no final, dramatic twist in a World Cup which has been full of joyous surprises and jaw-dropping late drama.

Twenty years after France won the first World Cup in its country’s history, a youthful Les Bleus side beat Croatia 4-2 in Moscow to win football’s most prestigious prize for the second time.
This was the highest-scoring final since 1966 and an entertaining climax a wonderful tournament deserved. In 90 high-octane minutes there was a controversial VAR decision, an own goal, record-breaking feats, a pitch invasion and an underdog pushing a heavyweight to its limit.
    A Mario Mandzukic’s own goal and a controversial Antoine Griezmann penalty either side of Ivan Perisic’s wonderful long-range strike gave France a 2-1 lead at the break.
    Arguably, France was undeservedly ahead but by the hour Les Bleus had scored two further goals, through Paul Pogba and Kylian Mbappe, to put France in command and the result in little doubt.
    A dreadful error by captain Hugo Lloris allowed Mandzukic to reduce the deficit in the 69th minute and though Croatia went in search of more goals in the closing 20 minutes France, despite nerves creeping in, refused to fold.
    As the heavens opened, France celebrated wildly on the pitch and Didier Deschamps, who etched his name in the record books by becoming the third man to win the World Cup as a player and head coach, following Brazil’s Mario Zagallo and Germany’s Franz Beckenbauer, was thrown into the air by his players and staff.
    French President Emmanuel Macron, who was at the Luzhniki Stadium, tweeted “Merci” to the players after the final whistle.
    Mbappe, aged 19 years and 207 days, also further cemented his status as the most exciting young talent in world football with a long-range strike which made him the second-youngest player to score in a final after Pele, who scored as a 17-year-old in 1958.
    Deservedly, the Paris Saint-Germain star was named the competition’s best young player.
    https://www.cnn.com/2018/07/15/football/france-croatia-world-cup-final-russia/index.html

    10 Things Remarkable Parents Do (That Set Their Kids Apart from the Rest)

    By Angela Pruess

    At any given time you’ll find four or more parenting books on my Amazon wish list, a few by my nightstand, and an email box chock full of insightful parenting theories and approaches.

    Granted, child development is my career, but I speak with plenty of parents in my practice who find themselves in similar circumstances.

    With information around every corner and our culture projecting constant messages (many times contradictory) regarding how we should raise our kids, feeling like a confident and intentional parent can seem out of reach many days.

    In my 12 years as a family therapist, I’ve seen many well-intentioned parents mistakenly employing strategies that aren’t meeting the emotional or developmental needs of their children or families. I’ve also observed an increasing number of parents that are successfully mapping out new and healthier ways of raising children.

    These insights, collected over time and gleaned from experience, parallel what we know from current brain and behavioral research about what kind of parenting is most likely to contribute to the healthy development of children.

    1 | Know that kids will act like kids.

    Often parents forget that the way a child’s learning begins is by screwing up. Making mistakes. Behaving immaturely. The ‘magic’ happens when a supportive caregiver then steps in to steer them in the right direction. We get frustrated and impatient, becoming annoyed with whininess and ‘back talk’ when really, this is how kids are wired.

    The part of the brain responsible for reason, logic and impulse control is not fully developed until a person reaches their early 20s. Immature behavior is normal for immature human beings with immature brains. This is a scientific reality that helps us to be patient and supportive in order to guide our children when they struggle.

    2 | Set limits with respect, not criticism.

    Due to the fact that our kids need to learn literally everything about the world from us, they will require many limits throughout their day. Without proper limits in their environment, kids will feel anxious and out of control.

    Limits can be delivered in the form of criticism and shaming, or they can be communicated in a firm but respectful way.  Think about how you appreciate being spoken to at work and go from there.

    3 | Be aware of developmental stages.

    Have you ever questioned where your easy-going toddler disappeared to as he was suddenly screaming bloody murder while getting dropped off at daycare? Hello, separation anxiety!

    There are literally hundreds of very normal, very healthy transitions kids go through to become adults. Being aware of these puts their puzzling behaviors into context, and increases the odds of reacting to them accurately and supportively.

    4 | Know your child’s temperament and personality.

    It seems pretty obvious, but if we are in tune with the characteristics that make our child unique, we will have a better understanding of when they may need additional support, and when and where they will thrive.

     

    Once you know the basics of what makes your child tick, many important areas become much easier to navigate, such as pinpointing the best environment for homework, or understanding why your daughter needs to come home from overnight summer camp.

    5 | Give your child plenty of unstructured play time.

    Unless you studied play therapy in school, most adults will never fully understand and appreciate the power of play.

    Play is how kids learn all the things and develop all the stuff. This means leaving time each day for straight-up unstructured, kid-controlled, exploration of the world kind of play.

    6 | Know when to talk and when to listen.

    Kids learn to be pretty good problem solvers if we let them. Because we love the life out of them and want them to succeed, it’s hard not to jump in and solve problems for them by virtue of lecture or criticism.

    If parents more often held their tongues and waited it out, they’d be shocked at how often their children can successfully reach their own conclusions. Being heard is powerfully therapeutic, and it allows us to think things through and reach a solution.

    Kids want and need to be heard, and feel understood. Just like the rest of us.

    7 | Have an identity outside of your child.

    Many of us often claim that our children are our world, and this is certainly true in our hearts. In terms of daily life however, parents need to have more. We need to nurture the friendships, passions and hobbies that make us who we are as individuals.

    Doing this can feel like a battle, as our protective anxieties try to convince us our children can’t be without us, and also that we can’t be without them. But we can be, and need to be, in order to stay sane, and avoid saddling our kids with the task of meeting all of our emotional needs.

    8 | Understand that actions speak louder than words.

    The way you interact with your child and live your life will be your child’s greatest teacher. Kids are incredibly observant and way more intuitive than we give them credit for. They are always watching.

    This can be slightly inconvenient for parents, but if we’re able to keep it in mind, knowing our children are watching our actions will not only teach them how to behave, but it will make us better people.

    9 | Recognize that connection, fun, and creativity are the best ways to promote positive behaviors and a cooperative attitude.

    Fear and control aren’t effective long-term teachers for our kids. While those dynamics may appear effective in the short-term, they won’t equip our kids with a strong moral compass, or effective problem-solving skills.

    If our child feels valued as a person based on our interactions with them, they will naturally learn to value others and have the confidence to make good choices.

    10 | Set the overall goal to shape a child’s heart and not just their behavior.

    We often get the impression from the world around us that the goal of parenting is to produce a compliant, well-behaved child. While these are certainly desirable qualities for most parents, they are not core qualities that contribute to a happy and healthy human.

    Helping our children understand the importance of their thoughts and emotions gives them coping and relationship skills. Skills that will protect and guide them throughout their lives.

    Changing our parenting habits and styles is never easy, but if it’s truly in the best interest of our children, it’ll always be worth it.

    **This article originally appeared on Parents With Confidence

    Read Next On FaithIt
    “He Was Starving—Literally”: Grieving Mom on the Breastfeeding Mistake That Killed Her Baby

    Read more: https://faithit.com/10-things-remarkable-parents-do-set-them-apart-angela-pruess/

    Here’s the technology behind those mesmerizing drone light shows

    Alex Jones believes Democrats planned "civil unrest" for the Fourth of July. Maybe he's thinking of fireworks.
    Image: Getty Images

    Where will you be on the Fourth of July? 

    Alex Jones thinks Americans will be fighting in a vicious battle over avocados and soy milk. The often disgraced conspiracy theorist and self-proclaimed “performance artist” claimed that Democrats are planning to launch a civil war on Independence Day in a tweet on Monday. 

    In the video Jones posted, he ranted that “establishment publications” that communicate with the government instead of the general public “began to develop a plan” using civil unrest and “racial strife” in order to “force Trump out.” 

    OK, Alex. Maybe he misinterpreted the annual fireworks displays as “civil unrest.” 

    But his attempt at riling up the public was turned into a patriotic meme as Twitter users imagined where they would be if a second civil war broke out. 

    Twitter users responded withthe hashtag  #SecondCivilWarLetters, joking about battling incels and searching for Starbucks safe houses.

    Like the correspondence between soldiers and their loved ones during the “first” American Civil War, Twitter users kept their spouses and family members posted with updates from the front lines of battle. 

    It seems like everyone’s running away to Canada.

    The leftist battalions also made fun of the alt-right’s fondness for tiki torches, which is just about as intimidating as their khakis.

    War is rough, everyone. Where are the avocados??

    They did it to own the libs, obviously.

    It’s all quiet on the far right front. 

    In the video he released with his tweet, Jones actually admitted: “I’m not that smart!” 

    “How did you know they were planning a civil war,” Jones asked nobody in particular, before claiming that news organizations have been planning this “civil war” all along. “I told you! I’m not that smart!” 

    So no worries, you won’t have to fight through Chick-Fil-A on the Fourth of July. Alex Jones himself said he isn’t that smart. 

    Read more: https://mashable.com/2018/07/03/second-civil-war-letters-alex-jones-conspiracy/

    What Trump supporters think of family separations at the border

    Mesa, Arizona (CNN)As the Trump administration has ramped up the practice of separating children from their parents at the border with no clear plan for reuniting them, critics have been unsparing, calling it “government-sanctioned child abuse.”

    US law does not mandate separating undocumented families; the uptake in such separations is an effect of a zero-tolerance immigration policy the administration enacted in May to prosecute anyone who crosses the border illegally.
    “I blame it on the parents for letting it happen because they bring them up and know they can’t get across there legally,” said Ron Carroll, a 69-year-old resident of Mesa, Arizona.
      Other supporters of US President Donald Trump say their feelings on family separation are not so cut and dry. “I don’t want to see families torn apart, but I also support enforcing the law,” said Jessica Lycos, a political consultant based in Phoenix.
      CNN spoke to eight people who identified as Trump supporters over two days in the border state of Arizona. Here’s what they had to say about the controversial practice:

      Ron Carroll

      Carroll was one of four supporters of who spoke to CNN on Tuesday about family separation over breakfast at Nana Dee’s Diner in Mesa.
      A retiree originally from St. Louis, Missouri, Carroll says President Trump should stand by the practice despite intensifying criticism.
      “He should enforce the laws like he’s doing, and our Congress needs to abide by the laws and follow the laws and enforce the laws. Not go against our President,” he said. He said he blames backlash over the practice on Congress for signing off on a law without knowing what it says, going back to the Obama administration.
      It has long been a misdemeanor federal offense to be caught illegally entering the United States, punishable by up to six months in prison. Previous administrations largely opted not to pursue criminal charges against people who crossed illegally with children, referring them instead mostly to immigration courts.
      Under zero tolerance, apprehended parents are held in federal prisons where their children can’t join them.
      “Like I said earlier, it’s the parents that bring them up, and they already know they’re going to take them away, so to me there’s no issue there, Carroll said.

      Madeline Carroll

      Carroll’s wife agreed with him that parents were to blame for being separated from their children. Family separation should be enforced as long as zero tolerance is an administration priority, she said.
      “To be perfectly honest, I’m angry at the parents,” she said. “I feel very honestly that it’s their fault that the children have been separated, because they’re bringing them in illegally. And the other thing is, the law that has been put on the books was not put on recently. It was put on back many years ago, and I think very seriously that they need very firmly to say enough is enough.”
      She faulted the media for using children to play on people’s emotions.
      “I think people need to stop constantly bringing up the poor children, the poor children. The parents are the problems. They’re the ones coming in illegally,” she said. “Quit trying to make us feel teary-eyed for the children. Yes, I love children a great deal, but to me, it’s up to the parents to do things rightfully and legally.”

      Carl Bier

      The 84-year-old retiree said undocumented immigrants should face consequences for trying to cross the border illegally. He worries about “bad guys” coming into the country, or that people may falsely claim to be parents to gain an advantage by using children that are not their own.
      “Here’s how I feel about it: When I was a kid, 16 years old, I got fined for swimming in a lake ’cause I didn’t follow the rules,” he said. “These people that we have coming across the border illegally are breaking the rules. I have no feelings for them at all.”

      Sonya Coppa

      This mother of two says children affected by family separation are the victims of their parents’ poor choices.
      “Unfortunately, those parents and those children are feeling what their choices are.”
      A resident of Globe, Arizona, she says she worries about families of undocumented immigrants living off the state. Parents should enter the country legally if they want to be here.
      “You can’t just come into this state and reap,” she said. “Do it legally, get your card, become a citizen pay your taxes. That’s what I believe in.”

      Jessica Lycos

      Lycos attends “Politics on the Rocks” meetups, a monthly networking happy hour for people whose politics skew conservative. She and three other members of the group who identified as Trump supporters sat down Monday with CNN in a restaurant in Scottsdale, a Phoenix suburb.
      Lycos said she doesn’t want to see families torn apart.But she said she could imagine scenarios in which separation might be appropriate, including when a family relationship can’t be proven or if the adult is suspected of another crime aside from illegally crossing the border. (Under the zero tolerance policy, neither scenario need apply for family separation to occur.)
      She said she believes that family separation is a symptom of bigger ruptures in the immigration system. “We have people who came here the right way. We need to fix the broken immigration system in general.”

      Brian Shiau

      The vice president of a private equity holding company, Shiau said he doesn’t believe that the administration intended to harm families.
      But it appears that the administration did not fully think through the “human aspect” of how enforcement of a zero tolerance policy would play out, he said.
      “I don’t think the people involved want to do it this way, but that’s the way that the policy has been instructed for them to do,” he said.

      Renee Padilla

      Padilla, who works in human resources said she does not support separating families at the border. But she supports securing the border, she said, and family separation is part of that, for better or worse.
      The practice of family separation started before the Trump administration, she said — it’s just now being implemented at a greater frequency through zero tolerance.
      “It’s not just involving separating the families — we’re trying to secure our borders to stop the drug trafficking, the sex trafficking and I think it goes a little deeper,” she said.
      “At the end of the day, to make America great again I think both sides of the aisle need to come together.

      Pascal Kropf

      Kropf, vice-president of “Politics on the Rocks,” said he doesn’t think children should be taken from their parents. But as long as a law that leads to family separation is “on the books,” it should be enforced.
      “If we don’t like it, let’s get together and change it. Let’s fix it,” he said. But, with the midterm elections coming up, and the tendency of politicians to play to their bases, he said he’s doubtful that bipartisan compromise will come soon.
      “Unfortunately … it’s politics.”

      Read more: https://www.cnn.com/2018/06/19/us/trump-voters-family-separation/index.html

      Pippa Middleton Finally Confirms Pregnancy In Candid Essay!

      Congratulations to Pippa Middleton!

      For a couple months, we’ve heard the rumor Kate Middleton‘s charming younger sister and husband James Matthews have an English muffin in the oven.

      Royal Wedding: All The Celebrities Who Attended Meghan Markle & Prince Harry’s Nuptials!

      Well, on Thursday the 34-year-old writer finally confirmed her first pregnancy in a guest article for Britain’s Waitrose magazine, all about how to keep up her fitness regime during the first trimester, writing:

      “I’m fanatical about sport and have looked at loads of books and websites on exercise during pregnancy but have been disappointed by the limited technical information on what you can and can’t do.”

      She says the couple were staying secretive during the “early months” — we didn’t even see a bump in her Royal Wedding outfit (above, gallery) — so she couldn’t consult a trainer either.

      So she went DIY. Get her deets (below):

      “So I decided to use my own initiative and adapted my current exercise routine, adjusting the weight and intensity to what felt right for me.

      I work out for 45 minutes, three to four times a week depending on my energy levels, but ensured that the routines I did were lighter than usual.

      I’ve noticed my body change but through exercise, I feel it’s being strengthened.”

      That is going to be one unstoppable baby!

      [Image via WENN.]

      Read more: http://perezhilton.com/2018-06-07-pippa-middleton-pregnant-husband-james-matthews-confirmed-fitness-essay

      The Way by Kristen Wolf

      Book Summary

      Anna is a striking and spirited young girl living in ancient Palestine where being a daughter is a disappointment. While her father excitedly anticipates the birth of his first son, the invisible Anna endures a life of drudgery. One bright spot in her world is the crippled old woman living by the village well who declares that the headstrong girl possesses a powerful destiny. But before the elder can reveal her prophecy an unexpected tragedy strikes Anna’s family and her father—dressing Anna as a boy—sells his daughter to a band of wandering shepherds.

      Abandoned and armed with only bravery and wits, Anna must learn to survive the harsh desert and unruly men. Yet just when she masters her bold life of disguise, she stumbles upon a den of mysterious caves and is captured by the secret band of women living inside. Unable to escape, Anna soon discovers that the sisterhood’s mystical teachings and miraculous healing abilities have forced her to question everything she’s been told to believe and—to her amazement—unleashed an astonishing power within her.

      But when violent enemies opposed to the women’s ways threaten to destroy them, Anna vows to save her mentors and preserve their powerful wisdom. Forced again to leave home and loved ones behind, a transformed Anna returns to the world of men—as only she can—determined to unfold a daring and dangerous mission: One that will put everything she’s become to the test. Will she succeed…or be condemned?

      Amazon Link – https://amzn.to/2Ng0NuD

      “A young girl in ancient Palestine struggles with her calling as a spiritual leader in Wolf’s audacious, deftly woven debut.” –Publishers Weekly

      “This book took me on a journey… I was surprised in more ways than I ever could have imagined. THE WAY is one of those rare novels that makes you think.” – Javier Sierra, New York Times bestselling author of The Secret Supper

      “Remarkable story, beautifully told.” – Mary Johnson, New York Times bestselling author of An Unquenchable Thirst

      Author Bio:

      KRISTEN WOLF is an award-winning author, creative and wondernaut living in the Rocky Mountains. Her debut novel, THE WAY, was hailed by O, The Oprah Magazine as “A Title to Pick Up Now!” Her second novel, ESCAPEMENT, won a 2018 IndieReader Discovery Award. A graduate of Georgetown University, she was nominated to the Phi Beta Kappa honor society and holds an M.A. in creative writing from Hollins University.